Whew! I’m going to try this blogging thing again. In part because I believe it will be helpful, but mainly because I encouraged someone else to start one even though I seriously neglect my own.
If you know me/follow me on Twitter/are a friend on Facebook (assuming you pay attention) you can tell that something has been going on with me. While I’m not ready to disclose everything that has happened, I can say that I have experienced some things that have forever changed my life–and I don’t know exactly how I’m supposed to feel now.
I wanted to write about this topic while the feeling is still raw, but I am able to grasp my emotions. I have a newfound appreciation/respect/love for my mother. Our relationship, as most, has been turbulent at times, but now I can honestly say that I am so blessed and grateful to have her. Unfortunately, it has taken some heartache and sheer anger to get to this point.
About two weeks ago, I went through a situation that I would never wish on anyone–it has been the most frustrating, painful and joyful experience I have ever had. Seriously. And through it all, my mother has been right there! She’s held my hand, wiped my tears, laid in bed with me, spoken words of comfort and still helps me through–from hundreds of miles away.
For the longest time, I could never understand why or how a Mother could (or could not, for that matter) extend the unconditional, exhausting love they are known for. Now I know. When I think about everything it takes to be a Mother, a real mother, its tons of work! Making the decision to make someone else your first priority, allowing them to take up residence in your body for almost a year (!), and having your heart attached to someone else–their joys, their pains, their mistakes and their triumphs is an incomparable sacrifice.
My mother has done just that and more. And I’m forever grateful.
